So my son had therapy yesterday. For those who don’t know (hey new folks!) my son’s mother (my ex-wife) was a monster. I mean a bonafide monster who abused her eldest son for 15 years before his grandparents finally took him away. She abused my son starting with our divorce when he was 4 and continued on until her suicide just recently. (He’s 14 now, so 10 years) The worst thing is that everyone knew it and turned a blind eye. They knew she lied about everything, but comforted themselves into thinking ‘this is different.’ Eventually, they could hide it no longer. They joined me in the fight for custody of my son. When everyone finally turned to the side of truth, she put a gun in her mouth rather than face the consequences of her actions.. It was bad enough that he was physically and emotionally tortured for 10 years, but when all was about to be right in the world, she pulled this to forever hang a burden of guilt on a little boy’s head for the rest of her life.
One of the hundreds (not hyperbole) tools of manipulation she used was therapy. She doctor shopped until she found a Dr. Feelgood who would believe mommy’s sad story and ignore the reality being presented by Dad. She’d gotten her diagnosis of ADHD for him (he doesn’t have it) and continued to medicate him heavily at times whenever she didn’t feel like parenting, or when the anvil of accountability was about to come down on her.
She used to sit in on his therapy sessions. It was a bit more than that though. She’d sit right by his side and control the entire session. She answered all the questions. When my son would disagree with her, or say something she didn’t like, she’d ‘correct him’ and for some reason, this fucking doctor went along.
It took me 2 and a half months just to get him into therapy because of the insurance that he had. His brother, who has been there for my son these past few years, insisted that he speak with the therapist. I didn’t object. My son didn’t object.
You see, if I tell you the whole story, you’ll never believe it. Some people just write it off as ‘ex spouse drama’ and other people simply refuse to believe that a woman is capable of being a monster on that level. However, when my son’s half-brother tells the story, it becomes far more believable. He lived it. He survived it and he’s not an ‘ex’, he was her child too. It seems silly, but it’s true.
Anyway, yesterday was only his 2nd appointment since her May 15th suicide (think about that), and his brother was adamant that he be able to speak his piece. We were actually good with that, but I had one concern.. and that concern became a reality.
His brother showed up 10 minutes late, but we were still able to get him in. He was supposed to spend no more than 5 minutes. Instead, he spent the entire hour long session back there. It basically turned into ‘his therapy session.’ When my son came out into the waiting room, he looked like he had been naughty touched.
I immediately asked him if it pissed him off or bothered him about his brother being back there the whole time. He didn’t want to answer, but reluctantly admitted that it really did. You see, therapy holds no credibility to him. We’ve been telling him that therapy can be a great tool and this time would be different.
Yet here we are and the SAME FUCKING THING HAPPENED. Instead of his mom, it was now his brother. To be fair, his heart was in the right place. He didn’t realize his misstep, but I assure you that I let him know. While he was recounting to me the therapy session details, I just interrupted him one time to say ‘So you sat back there, in his therapy session and you did all of the talking…. just like your mother.’
You could see his heart sink when I said that, as he hadn’t thought of it. I did. It won’t ever happen again. It sucks for him because his heart is in the right place, but this is my son’s life, his therapy and his recovery.
It should be noted that his brother is very much a part of that family that thought it was a good idea to have a birthday party for my son without his father.. So again I ask, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?